The trouble with advertising today

Here in the UK, television is shit. Mostly, anyway. And most of what isn't shit, is imported(I'm thinking Neighbours, Diagnosis Murder, Heroes, The Big Bang Theory, the rest is sports. A lot of which is imported.)

Shit TV I can handle, I have the power to ignore, switch off or change the channel. All from the comfort of my fat arse sitting on my sofa. What I cannot accept is shitty advertising.

Now, I love watching adverts. Some are really clever(see: Guinness' "Tipping Point" and the Sony "Colours" series for Bravia TVs*), others are not. My trouble is, I read too deeply into them. FAR too deeply.

I've noticed recently an influx of Thunderbirds on my telly all of a sudden. Two separate companies selling two very different products are both utilising the puppets of my childhood in order to try to get me to use/buy their product.

Drench sells bottled water. Drench advertises bottled water with Brains dancing to some crap song in front a pink stage. Not just any dancing, body popping. A puppet, nay, MARIONETTE should never ever body pop or break dance.

Also, Specsavers. Your friendly neighbourhood optician(not including vision express, et al) are using the remaining 'Birds to peddle their wares.

Brains was the only one of the Tracys to wear glasses. Brains does not sell glasses. Brains dances for water companies.

Where is the logic, exactly?

This leads me to think that Brains has gone renegade and that he is about to go all solo on us. Releasing cd singles and download only albums of lowering standards in order to feed his escalating cocaine habit(he always was the flashy one, on the quiet) until he's eventually found by some low-level journo at a piss poor supermarket tabloid selling his body and song rights to feed his (now) varying drug habits. In the article, he is likened to a John Frusciante type of character.
Eventually, Brains will see sense and return to the fold, but only after selling his story as a serialisation to the Sunday Mail "My Fight Against The Daemons," in 17 weekly installments adding up to the price of his 2nd auto-biography "How I Learned To Stop Using, And Learned To Love Your Mom." Allegedly, this caused a rift with Duck Tracy, who believed it to be a snide remark after Brains' supposed affair with Duck's mother. Despite her being both 78 years old and a duck.

This is, however, irrelevant. We all know that marionettes are asexual by Law. Therefore, Duck Tracy's allegations have no basis.

Actually, maybe I dont read too much into them after all. Maybe I'm like an advertising Nostradamus.

*Memo to both Guinness and Sony, dont feel obliged for the free advertising, but if you feel like sending me a shitload of free stuff, go ahead.